love

A Little Night Music in February

Music helps us to "keep time" in the sense of keeping us in touch with time, not just time as an ever-flowing stream that bears all of us away at last, but time also as a stream that every once in a while slows down and becomes transparent enough for us to see down to the stream bed the way, at a wedding, say, or watching the sun rise, past, present, and future are so caught up in a single moment that we catch a glimpse of the mystery that, at its deepest place, time is timeless. - Frederick Buechner, Wishful Thinking

At sunrise, past, present and future were all bound up in one moment as I saw strawberry plants proliferating through the winter weeds from last year’s garden.

I have never read anything by Buechner, but when I came across an article last year about his death, I realized I had heard his name before, in what season of life, I cannot remember, but his words dove deep into my heart that I knew I must read his writing at some point in the future. This month, through an online bookclub, I am making the effort to read one of his works. When I searched the internet for quotes on music, this one above met me in a personal way. Music does help us keep time with the fleeting moments of our lives. In fact, for me, it is a way to look back through my life at different stages and seasons. I often think in terms of the soundtrack of my life. Because music is such an important part of my life and being, when I hear a certain song, it brings me back to times and places and allows me to see “down to the stream bed” of that particular moment in time and what God was doing in my life back then. The following are my February selections to share some songs that might join you on your journey, and if nothing else, it may be a eine kleine nachtmusik to enjoy at the close of the day with a cup of Sleepytime tea.

Wait for the Lord - Taizé Community, music by J.Berthier

“Wait for the Lord, whose day is near.

Wait for the Lord, keep watch, take heart.”

Gathered together, and yet feeling each alone in a way, we knelt before the Lord with men and women from various nations, on the carpeted cement floor before candlelight and tapestry. Christians from various denominations and backgrounds were gathered to worship Jesus as a global Body. Awkwardly, we flipped through our songbooks full of worship songs in English, French, Latin, German, Zulu, Japanese, Tamil, and so on. We stumbled our way through singing songs in other languages and took in this experience of the Bride of Christ, believers in Jesus from different languages, tribes, and nations, gathered together in worship.

This was the first time I heard and sang this beautiful song of waiting and anticipation. The Taizé Community is an ecumenical monastic community nestled in the lush landscape of Taize, France, just a short bus ride from the small town of Cluny in eastern France. My husband and I traveled there sixteen years ago as part of a Christian worship & arts study trip. The kind people who lived and worked there, led our small group in worship, in work, and in discussion for our week long stay. I remember going for walks on the snow-covered bridge, the sun setting early, and enjoying simple, yet nourishing, meals from red plastic bowls. There was a stillness and calm reverence just being there. There was laughter in the midst of awkward cultural differences and language barriers. We all knew that to be there was a gift, and one where the Lord was doing a work in each of our hearts and minds. I long to go back there one day. It is a dream of mine.

We sing this song at our church plant. It is a song of perpetual advent, one that can be sung in the season of Advent, but also one that can be sung all year as we wait for the Lord’s Second Coming as He promised.

A winter walk at Taize, January 2007

Love Song for a Savior - Jars of Clay

“Someday He'll call her

And she will come running

She’ll fall in His arms

The tears will fall down

And she'll pray

I want to fall in love with you”

In 1994, a new Christian band came on the scene, Jars of Clay. Their album was named, Frail, and that year I was sixteen years old, and I was very frail. It was the year my life was upended by a chemical imbalance and anxiety disorder that turned me inside out and left me in a Job-like wilderness of confusion, brokenness, and despair.

It was also the year that the Holy Spirit was raising up song writers and music that would deeply touch me, ignite my emotions, and stir millions around the world in a revolution of heartfelt worship to Jesus. 1994 was a year of incredible worship music. This song was on repeat in my little car as I pushed the cassette tape into our ancient Toyota Corolla with no air conditioning, windows down, hair flying in the wind. I was sixteen, I was anxious, and I needed my Savior.

I don’t know the songwriters’ intentions behind this song or the story of how it came to be, or the industry standards each song and album needs to meet to make money. All I know is how this song impacted me. The Lord used this song as He stitched my frail mind back together. I knew His gentle eyes looked on me with blood-bought love and salvation. The strong sense of His sovereignty and love for me personally was something I needed very much, and something I wept for. The lyrics opened up the reality of multitude Scriptures and teaching I had received for years, and Jesus won my love and devotion, forever.

All throughout Scripture, God’s love for His people and each individual child of His is on full display, blood & covenant display, repeated over and over in the sacrificial system of the Old Testament temple to the actual incarnating work of Jesus the Messiah, whose love was expressed everywhere throughout Scripture from clothing the fallen human race, to His individual care for men and women in Old Testament antiquity, to the poetry of the Psalms, the messages of the Prophets, the redeeming love of a Savior, the God-Man who came to rescue souls from eternal judgement. His love for you is displayed, and He invites you into this Psalm-like desperate love and acceptance, this intimate relationship of Him with you every second of every day, the One who will never leave or forsake you. He is the One who is there with you now. The love He portrays through the picture of marriage between a husband and a wife, is just a glimpse of the unimaginable love of the Creator for His people.

Yes, Jesus did call me.

Yes, I did come running to my Rescuer.

Yes, the tears did fall down, over and over with love.

And yes, I did pray, “I want to fall in love with You”.

And I still look up into the sky and tell Jesus, “I love you. I love being loved by you.” I cry out from the depth of my being to love the One who first loved me.

Wildflowers by Tom Petty

Since it is February, and St. Valentine’s day is today, I want to share a little love song. In our newlywed years, my husband introduced me to a whole vast repertoire of music that was new to me. Tom Petty’s Wildflowers was one of those songs that we put on repeat in our little blue 2 door hatchback as we traversed the countryside on our adventures as husband and wife. I dedicate this one to my man:

“You belong among the wildflowers

You belong in a boat out at sea

You belong with your love on your arm

You belong somewhere you feel free…” - Tom Petty

Walking in Paris with my love, 2007.

Thank you for reading, beloved ones of the Father. May you walk through fields of wildflowers, sail on gentle waves, and find a song whispering to you of light, and life, and the love of the Savior.